My Favorite Quote

Posted on October 23, 2018 by haileyjaderyan

There are many inspirational things people have said, which are great mantras to live by. It doesn’t matter who said them – famous or not – if it is something that touches you, make sure it stays with you. We all need things that pick us up and remind us that life is actually wonderful. And I think that a quote is the easiest but also a very meaningful way to make that happen.

Never regret something that once made you smile. 

If there is one saying that always comes back to me, it is this one. I honestly don’t know who brought it into the world, but those words are really important to me. We all have those moments, when you feel like everything you’ve done is wrong. You start questioning decisions you’ve made in the past and if things would be any different, if you had chosen another path. I say having regrets is a waste of time and it only brings you down.

Sure, things can have big or small impacts, but ultimately I ask myself, did it make me happy and would I do it again, if I had the chance? Everything I have done in life were probably not always the smartest decisions, but they made me the person I am today and they brought me to where I am. Now I may not always be fully happy with my life, but when I put it into perspective, I’m not doing so bad.

I ask myself things like what if I had partied less in high school? Would I have made better decisions and would have figured out my future earlier? If I had made better decisions with men, would I be in a happy relationship now? What if I had said goodbye to toxic friends earlier? What if I had chosen a more secure path for my future? I could go on and on with things that were probably not my greatest ideas. I will never know how things would have turned out, but what I do know is that I hardly have any regrets. I’m not perfect and my decisions most certainly never were, but they made me happy.

I may have kissed all those frogs, but I had fun doing it. I may have had bad friends, but we sure as hell had really good times. I may have chosen paths that made it pretty hard for me to find my way in life, but I learned important life lessons along the way. I may have gotten drunk too many times, but the memories of crazy party nights I never want to miss.

I can’t change the past, so it doesn’t really help to question everything. If something made me happy in the past, it was worth it. And even things that hurt were good for something – I truly believe that. We shouldn’t beat ourselves up over all the what ifs and appreciate what we have and what we have accomplished, instead.

And if you ever feel like not being able to make a decision, listen to your heart and see how it affects you. Do you see yourself smiling? Then go for it and don’t look back. As long as it doesn’t hurt others, you should do whatever you feel like doing, because otherwise, you will once regret all the things you didn’t do.

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Photography: Fall Impressions #2

Posted on October 22, 2018 by haileyjaderyan

As I have mentioned a million and one times before, fall is definitely my favorite season. Especially, cause nature just looks absolutely incredible. This season really doesn’t make it very hard to take beautiful pictures, and some of mine, I would like to share with you. They’re from the past years and were taken at all kinds of different places. I try to always have my camera with me, since you come across gorgeous landscapes, everywhere. And it would be a shame not to capture the view.

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Why “Happier” by Ed Sheeran Makes Me Mad

Posted on October 21, 2018 by haileyjaderyan

Before you start hating me, let me say that the song is absolutely beautiful and pretty much gets me every time. Ed Sheeran just has a way of playing with people’s emotions and “Happier” is no exception. Still, I find myself getting upset over the lyrics.

I mean, have you listened to what he is singing? I am so over people and their “you only realize what you had, when you lost it” bullshit. Seriously, why can’t people just appreciate what they have? Why do people tell others that they love them, if the love isn’t big enough not to hurt them?

Ain’t nobody hurt you like I hurt you
But ain’t nobody love you like I do
Promise that I will not take it personal, baby
If you’re moving on with someone new

Love can be painful, and if someone screws up and the other person decides to forgive them, that’s their choice. But don’t talk about big love when you make big mistakes. And the whole thing about not taking it personal? Why thank you, how sweet of you. How about it’s none of your goddamn business, when the person you hurt moves on?!

As you can tell, this really upsets me. And I don’t even really know why. I just feel like we often use each other too much, take each other for granted and that should just not be the case. As difficult as relationships are, if we commit to one, we should honor it. And I’m not saying that I’m perfect, but we need to own up to our mistakes. And if we are forgiven, great. But taking it so far that a person cuts you out of their life, even though they love you, and just then realizing all the things you’ve done wrong is highly disturbing. And toxic.

Ain’t nobody hurt you like I hurt you
But ain’t nobody need you like I do
I know that there’s others that deserve you
But my darling, I am still in love with you

Telling someone you need them, after really hurting them, is just messed up. How about thinking of that a bit earlier? This makes me so angry, because this shouldn’t be how we treat people. When someone is important to you, show them. And you don’t have to let anyone treat you like dirt. Trust me, I’ve been there.

And I know how hard it can be to let someone go, even though they hurt you. But the song kind of makes it romantic and all, which it is not. It is heartbreaking and takes a while to get over. So having someone tell you they miss you and that they only now know your worth, after you’re gone, hurts.

So yeah, I may be a little too invested here, but this is why I get upset over these lyrics. I still sing them from the top of my lungs though.

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I’m Fructose Intolerant – What The Hell?

Posted on October 20, 2018 by haileyjaderyan

For many years now, I’ve been having a lot of trouble with my stomach and bowel. Yeah, that may be a little too much information, but whatever. I’ve been trying for a really long time to figure out what the hell is wrong with me. So I’ve had different endoscopy procedures without proper results, blood tests and all that fun stuff. Then my doctor wanted to find out if I’m intolerant to something and even though, I though it might be lactose, I actually reacted to fructose. The one thing I had already eliminated in my head.

So what does that mean? I don’t even really know. I’m still trying to figure all of it out. Fructose is basically sugar that comes from fruit and some vegetables. So fruit, juice, honey etc. are pretty much off limits. The main problem is that the normal sugar, which is in almost everything on this planet, contains fruit sugar, as well. Once I found all this out, I just felt like crying, because honestly, the sweeter the better.

fruit

Gladly, I have a bestie, who is highly interested in everything concerning nutrition and she helps me a lot with this. She informs herself, sends me helpful links, gave me my first jar of fructose free jam and is generally so helpful. That makes it a lot easier, to have someone you can talk to and who understands.

So now, I have a lot of books, lists and I’m just trying to figure it all out. The right way to go would be to fully leave out sugar for a while and then slowly test the amount I can actually eat and not feel bad. Well, I don’t really have the patience and would certainly starve, cause that doesn’t leave much food. But I do try to keep it out of my diet, as much as possible.

Gladly, I only drink water all the time, anyway, so fluids are the least of my problems. Some fruit contain an acceptable amount, so I stick to them. I bought fructose free gummy bears and even chocolate, so there are definitely alternatives. Also special ketchup, mayo, nutella and more. Unfortunately, it’s all pretty expensive. But comparing the special jam to the regular ones actually made me realize that this is not such a bad thing. It’s pretty disgusting too find out how much sugar is in everything, now that I check every label. And the jam tastes perfectly fine. It just has like 40 grams less. (I would love to give you a percentage, but I suck at math.) It will also not be the worst thing for losing weight. But I admit, there are things I do miss, but really try to avoid.

pancakes

I still eat things, that are not on the list of what I should eat, but it’s ok, if I don’t have to go anywhere or I just eat a little. I also have pills you can take in advance to help out. Apparently, also corn sugar, which is glucose and good for me, helps. I know this all sounds a bit confusing, but it gets better.

In case anyone is fructose intolerant as well, it would be really nice to get in contact. I don’t know anyone with this. And it’s not really popular like lactose or gluten. People would probably just roll their eyes, if I told them, cause I could be trying to start a new trend. Which, let’s be honest, a lot of people actually do, who are not allergic.

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Tag: Would You Rather – Bookish Edition

Posted on October 19, 2018 by haileyjaderyan

A good tag post never hurt nobody, right? I found this on the blog Pretty Purple Polka Dots by my friend Aoife and really liked it. Although I am ashamed to say that my reading has been incredibly terrible, I am still a huge lover of books and I have like 700 to 800 of them. I really need to count again. I’m slowly but surely building my own library, which is just the ultimate dream. So here is a little insight to my relationship with books and of course, feel free to do the tag yourself.

Reading

01. Would you rather have a friend who loses your books, or one who dog ears them?
At the risk of everyone hating me, I’ve done my fair share or dog earing books. Trust me, I don’t even know why. I wouldn’t be super happy for someone else to do it to my books though, but losing them would be a lot worse.

02. Would you rather secretly love a book everyone else hates, or secretly hate a book everyone else loves?
I don’t really care, if people hate or like things, cause I just decide what I like for myself and have no shame. I’m much more disappointed in myself for being super mainstream, which often, I am.

03. Would you rather be stuck in a very long plane or train ride without a book?
Definitely a plane. If there is a good entertainment system, I don’t need a book. And even if not, I usually have enough things in my backpack to do. I like to come prepared. Sleeping or writing are always good options. And I’m not a big fan of riding trains.

04. Would you rather have dinner with your favorite author or your favorite character?
Definitely character. I don’t really care much for the authors, sorry not sorry. I mean, I’m grateful for their amazing stories, but they’re not really on the top of my to-meet-list.

05. Would you rather date a character you have a crush on or your crush from real life?
Well, I can always keep dating a character in my creative mind, but I do prefer going out with my crush from real life. I don’t have one, though, which is weird, since for the most part of my life, there was always someone I was crushing on. I really need to leave the house more.

06. Would you rather have your favorite book turned into a movie, or your favorite movie turned into a book?
Definitely my favorite movie turned into a book. Seriously, can someone please publish Dirty Dancing? Thank you!

07. Would you rather read a book with an annoying cliffhanger, or one where your favorite character is killed off?
That depends, if it’s a series or not. If so, a cliffhanger may be super annoying, but overall, I can read more, since there will several books. If there will only be one book, a cliffhanger would just be cruel. Therefore, better kill him off, so I can find closure.

08. Would you rather lose the ability to read any new books, or the ability to re-read books you’ve already read?
I hardly ever re-read books and they’ve already given me wonderful hours of creative entertainment, so I’m always looking forward to new stories.

09. Would you rather live in a library or a bookstore?
Since I have this habit of not borrowing books, cause I want them all on my shelves, I’d say bookstore, although libraries are probably a lot more beautiful and contain works, no money can buy. But I don’t want people saying shhh all the time. I’m a talker and like to interact. So, bookstore.

10. Would you rather lose your place or get a paper cut, every time you read a book?
For some reason, I’m not sure, if I understand this question correctly. Does losing your place meaning losing the last sentence, page or so you’ve read? I’m just gonna go with that and say, I’d prefer that over paper cuts, cause they are brutal.

11. Would you rather have to always read in the dark, or always read books with tiny text?
I guess both is tough on the eyes. How can you even read in the dark? Do I have a flashlight? I need more information for this question. So I guess it’s books with tiny texts then. I can still see pretty good up close.

12. Would you rather read by a fireplace, or on the beach?
Isn’t a fireplace the perfect place to read? On the beach, you get sand everywhere, there are probably a lot of people and working on my tan would be more important than reading a book. But the fireplace is just ideal. Wrapped in a blanket and a cup of tea by my side sounds a lot better. I’m also more of an indoor person.

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