I’m pretty sure that most people who own a smartphone are in some form of group chat. No matter what chat service you use, there is usually the possibility of adding multiple people to a conversation. And it totally makes sense. When you don’t want to send the same message 36 times, you just share it once and be done with it. It’s super convenient. But also, one of the most annoying things ever invented.

I’ve been in all sorts of group chats via WhatsApp and still am part of twelve. I am glad that most of them are not really active. Even though they are pretty good for organizing things, I am not a big fan. So many times, I’ve used them to plan things, like a baby shower for a friend or to invite people to my birthday party. And a lot of times, it just all ended in pure drama. At some point, someone always starts bitching, and then all hell breaks loose.

The thing is, I always try to be polite and all, but when I am trying to put something nice together for someone else and you get in the ring with me, you should be prepared to deal with a lion. I can go from the nicest person on the planet to the queen of mean in no time. Crossing me isn’t a good idea. I am also good with words, so I can destroy you if I have to. In group chats this usually leads to people taking sides, private messaging in the form of “I totally agree with you but don’t want a fight” and then staying quiet. I mean – can you not?! And then there is the ultimate move: leaving the group chat.

You have no idea how much time and nerves group chats have cost me over the years. And still, I obviously use them to communicate. Sometimes, you also don’t have a choice. There are chats for work, family, friends, etc. and some of them I just have to be a part of. I also don’t want to be left out. So I have to endure the people who think it’s funny to just send literally everything to everyone — like your uncle who thinks he found the funniest meme ever. And then, depending on who it’s from, you have to decide whether or not to respond. It’s not easy.

Then there is always that one person who decides to ignore everything. You know, like  when the gang tries to figure out when to get together. It’s always the same person reading everything but not bothering to respond. Makes my blood boil. And then they need an extra invite and have to get called out in the group and all that jazz. It’s frustrating. And in my case, that person eventually left the group because of feeling ganged up on, after not responding, ditching us at a planned date and bringing one lame excuse after another, and finally, me not being the only one telling them off. Group chats are honestly not the right place for snowflakes. When you’re the one caught in the crossfire, it can be a lot. But then also don’t act like a moron and you’ll be fine.

I also don’t like when someone puts together a group chat with people I don’t know, and then I’m in it with my number. Sometimes, you do not want certain people to have it. I mean, I’m in groups with everyone from school because reunions were planned. But no, I don’t want all of them to have my number, because some people, I couldn’t care less about. And no, I am not mean, it’s just the way it is. So here is a tip from me: Make sure to have your picture only visible for your contact list, and just try to keep everything as private as possible. But obviously, go on a stalking spree.

So yeah, technically, group chats are a good and convenient invention. It’s fun to chat with several people you like at the same time, share pics, or whatever. But depending on the group dynamic, it’s just terribly annoying.

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