The Undateable Girl's Diary

Feminist: the person who believes in the social, political and economic equality of the sexes

You know those people who call you feminist and actually think that’s an insult? And those people who declare you as a lesbian because of your feminist way of thinking? Or those who are still shocked when women speak up for themselves, live their own lives, or love their bodies? I am writing this because I want to remind you of the century that we are living in. I want to remind you that we are all human beings. I want to remind you that it is simply not tolerable to suppress women. I want to tell you that we do not hate men. We just want equality.

I recently had a short WhatsApp conversation with a friend and we started talking/writing about how women are still being discriminated everywhere and that equality is always preached but never really achieved. It is shocking that in the 21st century it is still a huge topic. It’s constantly in the media and I question myself about why it is still this way. It’s because we still have to fight and we still have to justify the fact that we are feminists. I am a feminist and I am proud to be a woman.

Why are there still people who are shocked by the fact that someone directly points it out like this? “How is this something to be celebrated?” Even in our modern times, people have to face discrimination every day and I will never understand what goes on in people’s minds, when they have problems with people for being black, Muslim, gay or female, just to name a few. Unfortunately, this list could go on forever because people always find reasons to discriminate others, for no actual reason.

Today, I take a stand for women because I am a woman. I know how it feels to be called a slut just for wearing a short skirt. I know how it is when people don’t believe that you can pull off a career. I know how people look at you when you tell them that you don’t want to get married and have children.

In the past, a lot has changed for women and I will not disagree with that. But for me, that is not enough. I won’t let anyone tell me that we should be happy with how it is. Yes, we came a long way and I am grateful for all the women that have fought for our rights – for our social, political and economic freedom.

Because I am so fond of powerful women, I wrote my master’s thesis about Michelle Obama, because she is a great example. She is an intelligent, well-educated, beautiful black woman and she managed to make a lot of people like her, despite of their political interests. I am a fan of her because she is powerful, she is not afraid to speak up and she takes pride in being a woman. Furthermore, I dedicated my thesis “to all the independent women of the past who paved the way for independent women of the present and future to walk on it,” and of course to my mother because I am who I am because of her.

I am a feminist!

I want to be able to have what men have.

I deserve equality because I do equal things.

I deserve equality because I am equally powerful.

I deserve equality because I am a human being.

I deserve equality because I am a woman and I am fabulous.

We all are and we deserve respect. A lot of men forget who brought them into this world. Without the power of their mothers, they would not even be here. How dare you disrespect your mothers? Don’t you think they deserve everything that you do and maybe even more? And your sisters, friends or wives? Personally, I don’t think that a relationship of any sort can be healthy when one party downgrades the other.

I think that men are afraid of equality. I think that deep down they know how much power we have. I think that women who are fine with inequality are just choosing the easier path. Let someone else do the thinking and simply do what you are told. I mean, everyone should live the life they want to live, but I will never be able to understand it.

I know that I was born into a generation of independent women who are powerful and actually celebrated for it. Still, it has not reached the minds of all. We need more and more women who fight for our rights. You don’t have to do much. Just be whoever you want to be and don’t let anyone tell you that you are worth less than others.

Take a look at history. Take a look at the present. Everywhere you will find strong women who fight because they believe in feminism. Women like social activist Elisabeth Cady Stanton, who was a leading figure of the early women’s rights movement. She was a pioneer in the 1^st wave of feminism and we should be grateful for women like her starting it all. Women like Betty Friedan, 1^st president of the National Organization of Women and author of “The Feminine Mystique,”which was pretty much the starting point for the second wave of feminism. She discusses the circumstances of women as housewives, who are not seen as anything more powerful. She tried to open up the eyes of women, in order to make them see all the opportunities the world has to offer and that women have the right to live independent lives. And present-day women like the artist Beyoncé Knowles, a successful, beautiful and talented black woman, who empowers females all around the world to love themselves, to live how they want to live, to be feminists and to simply own it.

Who run the world? Girls! We are taking over and we will succeed.

Yes, we are allowed to vote. We are allowed to educate ourselves. But the issues are still there. You come across problems when you wear a short skirt, are proud of your body or are confident about your sexuality. Women get sexually, physically or mentally abused, with the apology of them asking for it, because they are who they are or wear what they wear. I remember wearing a sexy outfit once, and some girl, with cleavage to her belly button, saying “Well, girls should not be surprised if they get raped when they look like this.” So it is our fault that we get objectified, abused etc. and not the sick mind of those who do it? You should think about that very carefully.

Just a few months ago, porn star Christy Mack was reportedly beaten by her former boyfriend MMA fighter War Machine. What I found most disturbing about the whole situation is the fact that his fans started raging against Mack for getting the police involved, arguing that as a porn star, she didn’t deserve better. Kim Kardashian was questioned about why she, as a mother, would get naked for the whole world to see. Correct me if I’m wrong: so just because she is a mother, she isn’t allowed to be sexy? I am not her biggest fan but she looks amazing and if you don’t want to see pictures of her butt then don’t look. This is exactly why feminism is still a huge topic – because not everyone accepts women as they are and lets them do what they want. Porn star or not, Kim Kardashian or not, we can do what we want with our bodies and we can wear whatever we want to wear. It doesn’t make us bad people who deserve to be mistreated in any kind of way.

Feminism. It is still a huge topic in the media. Why? Because it is still not fully accepted. Women are not fully accepted. Open your eyes, people. We have women in politics (and I am personally very proud of having a female chancellor in Germany, whether I agree with her political views or not), we have highly successful women in the entertainment industry, we have women in pretty much every job there is. We have power everywhere – stop trying to take it away from us.

Accept us as we are.

Let us live our lives.

Let us be proud of our bodies.

Let us follow our dreams.

Let us be independent.

I am a feminist. I am proud to be a woman. I will not let anyone stand in my way.

I am a feminist!