Goodbye February 2017

Goodbye February,

and hello March, wonderful month of spring. Although from looking outside the window, I’m not really seeing it yet. Yesterday, we even had snow again and I won’t fully believe in spring until May. I definitely wouldn’t mind living in a warmer country. But enough about the weather, I want to talk about how February went.

Good. Yes, you read that right. For once, I’m declaring a past month as good. What the hell is wrong with me you ask? Well, I guess I’m kinda getting my life together and it was about damn time. I feel like I got used to working 9-5, although I will never be a major fan. Maybe it’s also because in the middle of the month, I switched locations and now I’m were I wanted to be, in the first place. I have a lot less commute and just in general a lot less stress. I also have my own office, which I definitely like. I can hear loud music, I don’t annoy anyone with my coughing etc. and I have my own wall I can decorate. I know, priorities, right? I get along with everyone and so far, I’ve done a good job. Go me! It just really makes you feel good about yourself when you start a new job and feel how it’s getting better and better. And I get to write about Germany’s Next Topmodel every week, which I think is pretty cool.

Anyway, February was definitely a busy month. There was not a day where I didn’t do anything. What the hell has my life become? Yup, as hard as I try, I’m not super lazy anymore. I leave the house a lot more and pretty much hung out with friends every weekend, and although I sometimes miss just doing nothing all day long, it’s better to be active. I can’t believe this is coming from me – Queen of laziness. But I guess a daily routine does work wonders.

Some of my highlights included the yearly fashion show for bridal and evening gowns that I always enjoy doing. Can’t believe it’s been nine years. Looking at the pictures though, I can totally see some major changes. I’m getting old. Speaking of, I turned 29 and the day itself was just not good, at all. But what can you expect from a Monday? I celebrated with some friends the weekend after and we had a fun brunch. And then a friend did the same, a week after. A few years ago, we would’ve thrown crazy parties and now it’s brunch at 10 am on a Sunday, where everyone is speaking about kids, houses, weddings etc. Except for me, of course, since I have nothing really to contribute to that. I always call it the housewife-channel because it’s exactly what it is.

I also went to the movies, photographed a wedding and did lots of tanning at the salon. You wouldn’t believe the craziness of my freckles. But I only go once a week and it just feels good. I think those were pretty much the highlights. Sure, nothing over the top but still a nice month. And I got lots of cute presents so that’s always super nice. I also requested some vacation days for April and I hope that I can visit one of my au pair besties in Denmark. Should that not work out, I’ll aim for London and maybe meet with some blogger friends. Either way, I’m making sure I’ll go somewhere because I really miss travelling and I need new pictures for Instagram.

So, my February was good and I hope that March will be, as well. Or just the whole year for that matter. I’m looking forward to exciting things and I actually feel ready for them to happen. I could just use a little more sunshine to go with everything and I’m sure I’m not the only one. Hope you all have a great month, beautiful people.

Tons of love,
Hailey 

unicorn-balloon

Lovely life
 Moana  when you have lots of things in common with people  tanning beds  being a journalist  quality me-time  when I can leave work on time  new stuffed Disney animals  old songs on the radio  that feeling when I’m in my writing zone  Lady Gaga at Super Bowl wearing beautiful wedding dresses being home early fun at work cute and unexpected presents spontanious dates with friends an office with a balcony good food anything with unicorns the sound of rain wonderful blogger friends getting used to the work-flow weddings making other people happy that weekend feeling positive feedback covering GNTM for the paper waffles  my stalking skills  having friends over  new Pokémon  chill nights  how fog makes everything look  breakfast  getting more than 100 likes on Insta pics 

Songs I love
♪  Auli’i Cravalho – How Far I’ll Go (From Moana)
♪  Sia – Helium
♪  Alessia Cara – Scars To Your Beautiful

Interesting articles and videos
Beauty in Diversity (An interview with a great friend of mine) // 21 Fucking Funny Tweets About Food That Will Make You Say “Same” // An incredible version of Toto’s “Africa” // This Beauty and the Beast themed afternoon tea is a Disney fan’s dream come true // I May Be Single, But As Long As I Have These Things In My Life, I Don’t Even Care // Why The Smartest Girls Have The Hardest Time With Love // 52 Places To Go in 2017 // 50 Tiny Things Every 20-Something Needs To Realize

My February posts 
Goodbye January 2017 // Why I Want To Be A Journalist // Yes, I kinda do! – I Want The Wedding But Not The Marriage // 29 Things I Learned In 29 Years //  When I Match On Tinder

My February Instagrams
instagram-february-2

Find me on social media: Twitter  Instagram  Facebook  Snapchat  Pinterest  Bloglovin

Posted in Goodbye 365 | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

When I Match On Tinder

To be honest, I thought I was through with Tinder, a little while ago. I wasn’t even considering actually meeting with people and just laughed my butt off swiping from face to face. But now that I pretty much have my life a lot more in order than last year, I thought I’ll just give it another shot. The thing is, I don’t even know what I want, since I’m not really a hook-up kind of girl but I also have major relationship issues so yeah, why the hell do I even bother? Because I decided to let life surprise me. Since I never really happen to meet people in real life, why the hell not reinstall the app?! And yes, I know there are a lot more serious apps to use but I don’t know. I’m not the person who wants to get matched with someone based on answers to questions like sunrise or sunset? Or create a major dating profile or whatever else you have to do on all these other options. I have commitment issues so I’ll just start with Tinder. And if they just want to hook up and I don’t, I can always just say goodbye.

So anyway, once in a while it happens that I match with someone. I guess the problem is that from 300 guys, I swipe right on like five of them. Yes, that’s the superficial, self-sabotaging moron I can be. But whatever. I want to like someone’s face and I don’t see that being a bad thing. That doesn’t mean that a pretty face is all that matters. So yeah, sometimes matches happen and this is just a little insight into my crazy mind. I know, I’m weird but that’s ok.

Boys Lie

*swipes right on like five out of 300 guys*

Ha, another match.

Mmmm, which of these matches do I actually pay attention to?

I should probably just delete them all.

No, you wanted to stop being a coward.

Not all men are terrible idiots. Right? RIIIIGHT???

Ok, here we go.

*picks the one who seems like he likes to travel but who didn’t overdo it with his choice of pics*

Do I text him?

Why isn’t he texting me?

I’m a grown-ass woman, I can text him.

What do I write?

Shit, this is so hard.

Ok, think, think, think…

Maybe just a hello?

Emoji, or no emoji, that is the question.

What the hell, the worst that can happen is him ignoring me.

I’ve been perfectly single for years, I don’t need anyone.

Ok, calm down and just do it.

MESSAGE SENT!

Oh God, oh God, oh God.

Damn, I wish I was more chill.

He texted back, ladies and gentlemen, he texted back.

I’m such a pro at this.

And my pictures look pretty good.

He likeeees me.

Calm down, moron. Remember about not actually caring?

This is not going bad.

Travels – always a good topic.

But how long will it last until he get’s all weird and only wants sex?

Does he only want sex?

How do I find out if he only wants sex?

No, I can’t just ask him.

What if he’s actually nice?

Why do I even bother, I’ll probably be bored by tomorrow, anyway.

Wow, a few hours later and I’m still not bored.

How is this even possible?

Let me go back through his pictures and see if I’m actually into him.

Stop being a superficial bitch and give him a chance.

Man, texting with this app is annoying.

Do I ask if we can exchange numbers?

I hate giving out my number.

He seems nice, though.

I gave him my number.

Dude, why aren’t you texting me like IMMEDIATELY???

*has minor panic attack*

Ah, here we go.

Oh fantastic, he wants pictures.

Why do guys always ask for pictures?

You ain’t getting nudes, hun.

Ok, he’s sending some, as well. Fully clothed from some travel adventures. Acceptable.

*Looks for the prettiest pictures her phone has to offer*

Still no major warning signs.

Should I check his spelling? Punctuation? Grammar?

STOP SABOTAGING IT EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!

Would I want to go out with him?

Wow, I can actually see myself going out with him.

How can we have so much in common?

Is this even possible?

Nobody who knows me is gonna believe this.

I need to stalk him online to find something I can’t live with.

How can I not find anything?

*looks through his pictures for the millionth time*

He’s definitely not fully my type.

I still kinda like him.

*hears Rihanna’s lyrics in her head*

♪ On the first page of our story
The future seemed so bright
Then this thing turned out so evil
I don’t know why I’m still surprised ♪

SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!

I have to stop doing this.

I mean, it’s not like I’m in love or anything.

For once just CHILL.

Yes, chill. I can do that.

To be continued…

Find me on social media: Twitter Instagram Facebook Snapchat Pinterest Bloglovin

Posted in #SingleGirlProblems | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

29 Things I Learned In 29 Years

What can I say, today is my birthday and I turned 29. So happy birthday to me! In the past, I’ve read a few of these posts from other bloggers and thought I’ll write one, as well. I didn’t want to wait until I turn 30 because I’m still debating if I’ll just stay 29 for next five years or not. Since my 20s haven’t exactly been super great, maybe 30 won’t be so bad but I still have one year to go and I’m curious to see what it has in store for me. Of course over the years, I’ve learned a lot about life and about myself and some of the things I want to share with you.

flowers

01. I don’t need a man to be happy. If it goes well, it’s just a bonus.
02. Never be too sure about the things you think you want.
03. Sleep is so much more important than parties.
04. Losing friends will always hurt but it get’s easier to let go.
05. Always being myself was the best decision I ever made.
06. Haters are always gonna hate.
07. Actual pants are totally overrated. Leggings for life!
08. Have an open mind so you can see all the beauty in this world.
09. I can actually live pretty good without 259 full closets.
10. You’re never too old to feel young. Always keep a piece of childhood in you.
11. No matter how much you hate school when you’re young, education is good and important.
12. People won’t die when they see me without make-up.
13. Cake is always a good idea.
14. Eventually you will find people who will love you just they way you are.
15. I will just never ever be a morning person.
16. No matter how rocky the road is, giving up is never an option.
17. It’s ok if you don’t want to get married or have children.
18. Fighting for something you believe in is worth it.
19. Don’t give a damn about your bad reputation and just live your life.
20. Adulting is annoying and expensive.
21. I don’t always have to put others first to be a good person.
22. A broken heart can heal. It will leave scars but it will hurt a little less, everyday.
23. Speaking your mind can get you into trouble but it sure feels good.
24. Everything feels better with good music.
25. It’s ok to move back in with your parents when you need to, no matter how old you are.
26. My bed will forever be my happy place.
27. Never take the wonderful people and things in your life for granted.
28. Mom was right about lots of things.
29. Life is a bittersweet symphony.

Find me on social media: Twitter Instagram Facebook Snapchat Pinterest Bloglovin

Posted in A Rollercoaster Ride | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Yes, I kinda do! – I want the wedding but not the marriage

Yes, I know that the title may seem a bit weird but that is exactly how it is. I absolutely love weddings but just the thought of getting married frightens me and I never saw myself being a wife. Last weekend, I took part in a fashion show for bridal and evening gowns, which I’ve been doing since 2009, so I felt like finally writing this post. I don’t know how many dresses I’ve worn in the last eight years, but there were definitely a lot and what can I say, I love it every single time. There is something so special about wearing a wedding dress, even if you’re not getting married. You always feel like a gorgeous princess and who doesn’t want that?!

Wedding dress

So today I want to share my thoughts and feelings about weddings and marriage. I never felt like I want to get married and even if so, the lack of men in my life would make it a little hard to tie the knot. Let’s be honest, me and relationships just don’t really work. Maybe I’ll give it another try in my 30s. Relationships are just a really hard thing and since I can’t even find someone that I’m willing to spend time with for a while, how the hell am I supposed to find someone to spend the rest of my life with? If I ever decide to give people heart attacks though, I’ll just get married. But I really don’t feel the need to. It still surprises a lot of people when I, a woman, in all seriousness declare that I don’t want to get married. It’s the 21st century so get a life. I don’t really see a point except for saving some money on taxes. However, this doesn’t mean that I don’t love when people get married. I support each and every single one who really wants it, from the bottom of their heart and does it for the right reasons.

I’m actually waiting for my friends to finally say yes but for some reason, they’re all taking their sweet time. They’re having children and building houses, but weddings are no where in sight. Dear friends, please stop doing this to me because I love weddings and I want to be at yours. I will probably also plan your wedding, since I love organizing and bossing people around, I will sing at your wedding, I will give a speech and everything else there is to do because that’s the person I am at weddings. The girl without the plus one, standing alone in those picture frame photos, but trying her hardest to make it the best day of your life. And I also have a ton of ideas for my friends because I know them very well.

Anyway, I would lie if I said that I never thought about how my wedding would be. As a matter of fact, I know exactly how it would be and my soon-to-be husband and I would have to be damn rich to afford it. Even though I don’t want to get married, I do want to believe that if you do, it’s forever. Sure, the statistics show that that’s definitely not the case but deep down, I am a romantic and I hope for everyone to only tie the knot once and live happily ever after. Therefore, if I would get married, I would go all out and beyond. I would be the craziest bridezilla ever and I would definitely warn my partner about this before saying yes. And I’m not talking about fighting over the color of my flowers with my mother in law. I’m talking bridezilla style where the groom won’t even be allowed to pick his own suit. I mean seriously, have you seen what’s on the market? Sure, everyone has a different taste and that’s completely ok, but hell no would he be allowed to choose some funky outfit. And he will also not be allowed to perform some dance routine with some of his half-drunken buddies. I just don’t like it.

Weddings dress

Ever since I was 16, I knew where I would want to get married if I ever went for it. I don’t even know if you can rent the place but I’m sure with the right amount of money, anything is possible. There would definitely be pink in my wedding because otherwise, it wouldn’t be mine. I’m not sure what kind of dress I would want because I’ve worn so many different ones that I just don’t know it, anymore. I’m usually not a big fan of simple dresses, or anything with a neckholder or straps. But the thing with wedding dresses is, you just have to put one on and feel if it’s the one, just like in all those TV shows. I would probably take some people with me but if anyone would even dare to get all bossy and tell me what kind of dress I should wear, they would have to leave. Opinions are good but ultimatums or demands or anything like that are just a no-go. I always feel so sorry for those girls with low self-esteem who don’t have the guts to stand up to their families and friends and tell them what kind of dress they want. Seriously people, if someone close to you gets married, remember that it’s not about you and your taste, so be helpful and supportive.

The thing is, my wedding would probably be very traditional. Very over the top but nothing like dancing toward the altar or any other crazy routines. Just a sweet and romantic slow dance. Since my location includes a pond and a beautiful staircase made of stone, there would be lots of lights and flowers involved. As much as I love churches, I don’t want to get married in one, since I’m not religous and it wouldn’t feel right. I would have many photographers around to cath every moment and my hand would be on top when it comes to cutting the cake. Trust me, I totally got most of my wedding all in my head. And for anything I’m not sure about, there is always a Pinterest board. It’s actually a shame that I’ve never felt the urge to go for it but even though I’m pretty sure that it won’t happen, unless I get very drunk in Vegas, you never know what the future holds.

I admit, it sounds a little crazy to think about my wedding so much, when I actually don’t want to get married. I would really love to have this wedding though because I’m sure it would be epic, but as long as it’s not possible to marry myself or my bed, I guess it may just never happen.

Find me on social media: Twitter Instagram Facebook Snapchat Pinterest Bloglovin

Posted in #SingleGirlProblems | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Why I Want To Be A Journalist

journalismWhen you’re a child, you have all kinds of ideas of what you want to be when you grow up. I definitely said I wanted to be a vet because my mom thought of becoming one when she was younger. When I was a teenager, I started thinking about more creative jobs. In my graduation yearbook, it actually wrote that I want to study interior design or photography. Well, that didn’t quite work out. I’m one of these people who are interested in so many things and it has always been hard for me to choose something. In general, I just don’t like being tied to something and the thought of doing the same thing for the rest of my life truly scares me. Of course, choosing a job doesn’t mean that you have to stay with it forever, but in terms of studying and job training, you do have to choose a direction, at some point.

I ended up studying American Studies, something hardly anyone ever understood. I can’t tell you how many times I had to explain to people what exactly I’m doing and what I can do with my degree. At some point, I answered with: I want to be a journalist. The more I thought about it, the more I knew that it’s the only thing I could imagine doing for the rest of my life. I’ve always loved writing and photography so much, so it’s pretty much the only thing that makes sense. And since I hardly know a journalist who actually studied journalism, I was good with my field of study. One of them once told me that you can always learn techniques and computer programs, but you need to have something you’re passionate about to produce content. Also, I think that nobody can really teach you talent. Either you’re good writer or you’re not.

The problem with journalism is that lots and lots of people want to work in the media industry. Unless you know people in higher positions, it is super hard to get in. I know that because I’ve been unemployed for over a year, despite having done everything required for a position as a journalist. In Germany, you need A-levels, preferably a Master’s degree, job experience, language skills, photography skills and a whole lot of other things which apparently are super important for the job. I pretty much fulfilled every single one of them and still didn’t get a job. It’s the most frustrating thing I ever had to go through. I started doubting myself so many times. I wasn’t sure if it was the right decision and thought about doing something else. The problem was that I don’t really have the qualifications for anything else, and I couldn’t see myself doing anything other that write. So I continued trying.

This year, I finally started my first real job in journalism. It’s a trainee position to officially become an editor. It’s actually nonsense, since you pretty much do the same work as anyone else except that you get paid less, but for most positions in Germany, you need this official training. It’s just the way it goes and I’m glad that I’m finally working toward my future goals. And trust me, I have many plans for the future.

There are lots of reasons why I decided to become a journalist. It took me a while to figure out what kind of genre I want to work in, but after a few internships, I figured out which direction is right for me. I want to do serious journalism because for me, it’s important to write about important and real things. I want to meet people and tell their stories. I want to do something that matters. This realization took a while because for some reason, I always thought I wasn’t serious enough and that I’m better off writing gossip or girls-stuff. If someone would’ve told me a few years ago that I would someday prefer writing about politics over celebrities or whatever else I was once interested in, I would’ve never believed it. Well, screw all of those thoughts because I am totally interested in serious topics, I always have an opinion and I’m never afraid to share it. So that’s what I’m doing: working toward serious journalism. And all the other things, I can always cover through blogging.

So why do I want to be a journalist, work in a super tough field with lots of competition, crazy hours and shitty payment? Because I can’t imagine myself doing anything else. I need to be creative and writing means everything to me and I can do photography, as well. I want to meet all kinds of different people and the job is versatile which is good because I’m interested in so many different things and get bored very easily. It makes me so proud when I see my work in a newspaper and I think the whole media machine is just very important. And what is most important: so far, this job always let me be myself. No matter where I worked, I was able to just wear my clothes, I never had any problems with my tattoos and my bubbly and open-minded personality actually works pretty well. And nobody ever judged me for always using a pink highlighter or having a planner with a Disney princess on it. Because the thing is, it’s the skills that should matter and nothing else. And not to forget, I can listen to music while working, which totally brings me into my zone.

Journalism makes me happy and I have so many plans for the future and where I want to go. I’m actually excited because there are so many opportunities. And since I already know how damn hard it is to get in, that a rocky road can’t shock me, anymore.

Find me on social media: Twitter  Instagram  Facebook  Snapchat  Pinterest  Bloglovin

Posted in A Rollercoaster Ride | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments