The Undateable Girl's Diary

Yes, I know that the title may seem a bit weird but that is exactly how it is. I absolutely love weddings but just the thought of getting married frightens me and I never saw myself being a wife. Last weekend, I took part in a fashion show for bridal and evening gowns, which I’ve been doing since 2009, so I felt like finally writing this post. I don’t know how many dresses I’ve worn in the last eight years, but there were definitely a lot and what can I say, I love it every single time. There is something so special about wearing a wedding dress, even if you’re not getting married. You always feel like a gorgeous princess and who doesn’t want that?!

So today I want to share my thoughts and feelings about weddings and marriage. I never felt like I want to get married and even if so, the lack of men in my life would make it a little hard to tie the knot. Let’s be honest, me and relationships just don’t really work. Maybe I’ll give it another try in my 30s. Relationships are just a really hard thing and since I can’t even find someone that I’m willing to spend time with for a while, how the hell am I supposed to find someone to spend the rest of my life with? If I ever decide to give people heart attacks though, I’ll just get married. But I really don’t feel the need to. It still surprises a lot of people when I, a woman, in all seriousness declare that I don’t want to get married. It’s the 21st century so get a life. I don’t really see a point except for saving some money on taxes. However, this doesn’t mean that I don’t love when people get married. I support each and every single one who really wants it, from the bottom of their heart and does it for the right reasons.

I’m actually waiting for my friends to finally say yes but for some reason, they’re all taking their sweet time. They’re having children and building houses, but weddings are no where in sight. Dear friends, please stop doing this to me because I love weddings and I want to be at yours. I will probably also plan your wedding, since I love organizing and bossing people around, I will sing at your wedding, I will give a speech and everything else there is to do because that’s the person I am at weddings. The girl without the plus one, standing alone in those picture frame photos, but trying her hardest to make it the best day of your life. And I also have a ton of ideas for my friends because I know them very well.

Anyway, I would lie if I said that I never thought about how my wedding would be. As a matter of fact, I know exactly how it would be and my soon-to-be husband and I would have to be damn rich to afford it. Even though I don’t want to get married, I do want to believe that if you do, it’s forever. Sure, the statistics show that that’s definitely not the case but deep down, I am a romantic and I hope for everyone to only tie the knot once and live happily ever after. Therefore, if I would get married, I would go all out and beyond. I would be the craziest bridezilla ever and I would definitely warn my partner about this before saying yes. And I’m not talking about fighting over the color of my flowers with my mother in law. I’m talking bridezilla style where the groom won’t even be allowed to pick his own suit. I mean seriously, have you seen what’s on the market? Sure, everyone has a different taste and that’s completely ok, but hell no would he be allowed to choose some funky outfit. And he will also not be allowed to perform some dance routine with some of his half-drunken buddies. I just don’t like it.

Ever since I was 16, I knew where I would want to get married if I ever went for it. I don’t even know if you can rent the place but I’m sure with the right amount of money, anything is possible. There would definitely be pink in my wedding because otherwise, it wouldn’t be mine. I’m not sure what kind of dress I would want because I’ve worn so many different ones that I just don’t know it, anymore. I’m usually not a big fan of simple dresses, or anything with a neckholder or straps. But the thing with wedding dresses is, you just have to put one on and feel if it’s the one, just like in all those TV shows. I would probably take some people with me but if anyone would even dare to get all bossy and tell me what kind of dress I should wear, they would have to leave. Opinions are good but ultimatums or demands or anything like that are just a no-go. I always feel so sorry for those girls with low self-esteem who don’t have the guts to stand up to their families and friends and tell them what kind of dress they want. Seriously people, if someone close to you gets married, remember that it’s not about you and your taste, so be helpful and supportive.

The thing is, my wedding would probably be very traditional. Very over the top but nothing like dancing toward the altar or any other crazy routines. Just a sweet and romantic slow dance. Since my location includes a pond and a beautiful staircase made of stone, there would be lots of lights and flowers involved. As much as I love churches, I don’t want to get married in one, since I’m not religous and it wouldn’t feel right. I would have many photographers around to cath every moment and my hand would be on top when it comes to cutting the cake. Trust me, I totally got most of my wedding all in my head. And for anything I’m not sure about, there is always a Pinterest board. It’s actually a shame that I’ve never felt the urge to go for it but even though I’m pretty sure that it won’t happen, unless I get very drunk in Vegas, you never know what the future holds.

I admit, it sounds a little crazy to think about my wedding so much, when I actually don’t want to get married. I would really love to have this wedding though because I’m sure it would be epic, but as long as it’s not possible to marry myself or my bed, I guess it may just never happen.

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